yesterday awake:

floating down the river, lots of big birds, very cold as the sun went down under the trees
disappointed friends as plans fell through- my forgetting

yesterday asleep:

traveling to another time with the hobags. when we were 22 for a summer, to all be together in a town and get jobs. we all woke into this place without a home, snuck into some guys house and slept in his guest room without him knowing. he found us in the am and asked how old we were. he was 28. i said in the future i am 28 but right now i am 22.

i was modeling and not as good as the other girls at posing. i was naked, greg was supporting me, in public, and didn't feel embarrassed or ashamed. people were doing headstands on platforms in the water. i went to try even though it looked hard. manatees were in the water. a lama held me in the water and asked why my left thumb was cracking. he looked deep into my eyes with concern. i said it was old. he scratched blemishes and pimples off my face. there were a lot.

there was a school. a asian female teacher of ASL and younger education, and an older black male teacher of writing and beer brewing. i wanted to be in the education class. i was signing and talking to someone on a tv screen. i signed WOW with both hands and was fooling around. she kicked me out of class. i went to the other class. i was tasting beer. he had so much to teach. i was intimidated.

my mom. something about my mom.